I N S I D E O U T Mental Touchstones for the Awakening Spirit K. Bradford Brown Introduction: _Mental touchstones for the Awakening Mind_ Many traditions refer to a 'sleep' which grips our lives. Recently Charles Tart described it in psychological terms as a kind of trance state: we are literally hypnotised by a world of unconscious expectations and beliefs, which blinds us to the nature of who, and what, we truly are. It is a state which seems indistinguishable from the world around us. Yet the source of the entrancement lies not in the world, but in our own minds. It is from the mind itself that we must awaken. The short pieces in this book present both a description of this process of awakening, and a series of surprises for the mind of the reader. Drawn by the simplicity and frankness of the language, you find yourself being confronted by paradoxical, contradictory questions, which require a new attention to the terms of your own thinking. It was this challenging quality which struck me when I first saw these pieces in manuscript form. There seemed to be no way to read them without also glimpsing the awakening of which they speak. In this, they stand at the heart of the work to which the author has dedicated his life. They are a powerful extension of the experiences I have come to associate with him, both as a friend and a teacher. To quote from one reader: 'These short pieces are really fighting the inertia, or enervation, of the will. They are thunder, and lightning too: enlightening, preeminently.' -- Patrick Reyntiens, OBE. David Templer I am indebted to the following mentors When you fear your own negativity as much as you fear that of others, you have made a giant step toward awakening. --Richard Willis Your Life is its intention. Life *as it is* is its intention. --W. Roy Whitten =============================================================================== AWAKENING 3 My nine year old feet destroyed the ant-hill. Something in me objected. I haven't been the same since. ***** 4 There is no event in your Life through which God is not trying to communicate with you... to wake up. ***** 5 Everyone is on a journey to somewhere. The question is where. ***** 6 Sooner or later you will be required to determine whose reality you are living, and whose reality you will live. ***** 7 You've got to get you are in it and own it before you can get out of it. ***** 8 You don't have to do a lot. You just have to be willing. The rest falls into place... unless it doesn't. Then you continue to be willing. ***** 9 Life begins not at birth, but with the onslaught of awareness. ****** 10 I am. I am not my thoughts. I have thoughts. I am. I have a mind. I am not my mind. I am. My mind thinks. I think my mind. I am... getting closer. ****** 11 I am fine when I am. ****** 12 It is not true there are no guarantees in life. Keep thinking you are worthless, and you will be. ****** 13 I observed: this man is his own star! ****** 14 The day came when it was more painful for the bud to stay closed than to open. ****** 15 When the pain of our living becomes too great to bear, maybe we will be ready to examine the death of our dying. ****** 16 It is not that most of us don't know what life is all about. We don't even suspect. ****** 17 We live on the stage of Life. Most of us have made the play a melodrama. ****** 18 We can only paint our pictures of life with colours we have stirred from within. ****** 19 Transformation is necessarily unbelievably believable. ****** 20 Lord, Deliver me from the plastic Jesus, the stone Buddhas and the pious voices. Open me to my neighbor's touch and the sounds of Life... in all its forms. ****** 21 Life is like my breath. It flows through me when I open to it. ****** 22 Standing, looking at the open sea and seeing it; this is worth waiting for. ****** 23 Love is the way in the way out and the way through. ================================================================================ CLEARING 27 You are not who you think you are. Neither are you who you are afraid you might be. So, take heart. ****** 28 Because I think a thought doesn't make it true. Most thoughts are profoundly false. ****** 29 When you have dealt with your own negativity you have made the first great step in self-fulfillment. ****** 30 Outward circumstances neither make nor break us, unless inwardly, we have identified with them. ****** 31 No one is to blame, but we all share the fault. ****** 32 I never feel "like" anything. I feel angry warm loving lonesome excited aroused hurt hopeful peaceful resentful irritated energised elated to mention a few... feelings. ****** 33 The more you choose to experience a negative feeling it dissipates. The more you choose to experience a positive feeling it expands. ****** 34 For every choice that is made others may not. That's it. ****** 35 You must make judgements, but you don't have to be judgemental. ****** 36 For heaven's sake, stop making "it" wrong. Stop making others wrong. Stop making yourself wrong. After all, you were never invited to preside as judge of the earth... or the heavens. On the other hand, what will you do with yourself when you're out of a job? ****** 37 When it comes to the quality of our Life, we often reason: at least bad breath is better than none. ****** 38 When will I get it? My negativity is mine. Your negativity is yours. Hell awaits me when I mix it up. ****** 39 Not one step in our growth is made alone. ****** 40 The Awakening process: I found it I lost it I found it again, then repeat. ****** 41 A choice for this means no choice for that. Living with it is called maturity. ****** 42 A clear mind isn't the end of it, but it sure beats whatever is second as a means of getting you there. ****** 43 You can't remain alone with guilt. It's married to resentment. ****** 44 It may be true there are many paths toward the goal of awakening. The straightest path possible will get you there sooner. ****** 45 If we'd complete what we start we'd find ourselves more often starting what we complete. ****** 46 The God our minds invented is an errand boy to remove the burdens from our hands, a magician to eliminate the dross from our daily tasks, a wonder worker to transform our crosses into jewellery. The God we got demands us to accept the truth about our fantasies. ****** 47 You may be in a spiritual logjam. Not to worry. God will either build a dam or send a flood. ================================================================================ RESPONDING 51 Life is a dance and you'll always have partners. As in any dance the best steps are not calculated. ****** 52 If you get angry a lot you probably hurt a lot. Try crying next time. ****** 53 When we are with it as we have it, the struggle stops. ****** 54 Handle first your closets, drawers and checkbooks. The rest is coming from just around the corner. ****** 55 It isn't so much what you do, nor when or where you do it, that makes the difference... It's the why. ****** 56 I've noticed my aliveness depends on my willingness to be alive. ****** 57 We often wade ankle deep in the issues of Life, crying out to everyone who will hear, "we're drowning." ****** 58 One of the greatest victories in the world is to live courageously with the apparent defeat of our wants or ideals. ****** 59 When life dealt me another bad hand, did it? ****** 60 The bigger game you play in life the more opportunities for failure and frustration... also more opportunity. ****** 61 Loving is its own reward. You can't love without feeling Love-d. ****** 62 If you don't succeed the first time try, try again, then, for God's sake, stop trying and notice. ****** 63 Noticing isn't everything, but without it there is nothing. ****** 64 Forgiveness is not an emotion, but the act of dying to my self-righteousness. ****** 65 When I love honour and respect you from the start there is no limit on what we can do or be together. ****** 66 The throat is the pathway between the mind and the heart, the gate across the moat. Open it to the king's trumpet now. ****** 67 The language God speaks is the language of life. You don't need a translator, but good ears. ****** 68 When I learn to embrace the God of the dark as well as the light, I shall see forever. ****** 69 Remember, one candle lights a whole room. ================================================================================ RELATING 73 My greatest blindness is failing to see I created you to treat me just as you do. It's easier to see it the other way around. ****** 74 Source of frustration: We see ourselves through the eyes of our intentions, ambitions, and dreams. _They_ see us according to our actions. ****** 75 Who do you hold above you or below you? Someone is being diminished. ****** 76 I didn't come into this world to live up to your expectations or you to mine. As a matter of fact, nothing else did either. ****** 77 People who know what's best for you don't. ****** 78 If no man is an island unto himself how do we account for so much water between us? ****** 79 Since it is evident I can't make you happy and you can't make me happy I'd sure like to know what this relationship is about. ****** 80 There are no degrees of being upset. You are or you are not. Either way, you're OK. ****** 81 Every woman is filled with rage. So are men. Given centuries of men being men and women being women how can it be different? ****** 82 Please don't help me. I need to learn to walk by myself. Only this-- remind me when I won't. ****** 83 Willingness to tell the truth opens every stuck door. ****** 84 I have to be me before I can be a we. ******* 85 When I want for you what I want for me, the alchemy of transformation will have completed a cycle. ****** 86 It is a shame when a child grows from being afraid of the dark to a man who is afraid of the light. ****** 87 If you must fear something, fear mental and spiritual blindness. However, fear won't make you see. ****** 88 "Let the world go. Nothing will change it. See to your own soul. That is the only thing. Deny Sin. Escape the wheel of Kharma if it is possible." Can the awakening heart accept such advice? ****** 89 Most spirituality is another illusion. The real thing looks like pulling on your pants one leg at a time. ****** 90 Consciously relaxing probably isn't. ****** 91 Going with the flow is damn good advice. ****** 92 Always watch what you say after the word, "but". It's what you really mean. ****** 93 I would love to help but, means I won't. ****** 94 You and me is _us_. Can _us_ ever be separated? ****** 95 When our lips discover the language of gratitude, our hearts will follow close behind. ****** 96 I am. You are. now what? ================================================================================ OBSERVING 101 More changes in our lives happen in spite of us than because of us. ******* 102 Life is about living. and not about getting a trophy at the end. ******* 103 Peace is not the absence of conflict but the presence of God. In that presence respect, honour, and love reign as peace. ******* 104 Hope may be the slenderest of needs upon which we may base our future. But for many humans slender needs represent a quantum jump in their resources. ******* 105 You ask, how do I know that life is perfect? Because it is exactly as it is. The mind insists on something else. ******* 106 The undiscerning mind is like a tree. It receives everything that falls on it. ******* 107 The Scriptures are about Life-- yours, ours, mine, and His, a mirror on the nature and the quality of our personal and corporate evolution, not an outline of do's and don'ts. We threw those out with mom and dad, unless we didn't. ******* 108 What am I to learn from all of this? There is a beginning a middle and an end. You'll never be quite sure which is which. And it's just fine! ******* 109 I can't avoid seeing me in you, no matter how much I think it's you I see. ******* 110 Love isn't reasonable. It seldom looks safe. Yes, it's the most sensible and the only safety. ******* 111 It may be that our misery is self-inflicted, but the friendly reminders of the righteous truthtellers do little to redeem our situation. ******* 112 Some wounds can't be healed by a doctor. We must lick them clean in a quiet place and wait for the earth to turn. ******* 113 The game is to accept emotionally the unacceptable. ******* 114 The mills of God grind slowly but exceedingly fine. Is that why I often feel like mincemeat? ******* 115 Better get this: There are no great men or women, only people like you and me. ******* 116 You can't avoid suffering, but you can avoid the misery of suffering. ================================================================================ ACTING 121 The next time you are at the end of your rope, try letting go. ******* 122 Life is going for the brass ring. You have to reach for it, and risk falling off your horse to get the prize. The rest of the people are passengers going along for the ride. ******* 123 I live when I don't act like death is riding on every decision or event. ******* 124 No one knows what is right and wrong, nor are they likely to in the near future. ******* 125 Our hope for tomorrow is how we live our today. ******* 126 Sometimes standing still is the best strategy. It is not doing nothing. ******* 127 The moment you get it is followed by a moment you don't. Then the work begins again with less effort. ******* 128 The search for eternal truth begins by getting out of bed each morning, going to work, playing with the kids, noticing the clouds, and seeing things to completion... naturally. ******* 129 If you haven't learned to listen yet, you haven't learned. ******* 130 If I am the effect of you and if you are the effect of me, and we are the effect of them and they are the effect of a thousand other effects--- which none of us dare to admit we are the effect of--- Is it possible we will ever be the cause of anything? ******* 131 Agreement with others of a common vision produces vast powers. Handle with great care. ******* 132 Life meets us coming and going. Unfortunately, we are usually coming when it is going and, going when it is coming. We can do something about that. ******* 133 We'll always be beginning. So what is the problem? ******* 134 I always thought that at some point I would arrive. I'm not sure at what. ******* 135 Today's inner battle won is tomorrow's building block. ******* 136 Our hope for the future is not our children but what we teach them now. ******* 137 If you do not participate in transforming the world, what is your alternative? ******* 138 When we fail to acknowledge, recognise, and honour our teachers, contributors, and Life itself, for the gifts received and upon which we have built what we call "our" lives, we are no more than thieves of the night waiting, in fear, for the rightful owners to claim it as their own-- leaving us with nothing... ******* 139 The beginning and the end of it all: Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you. ******* 140 You think you have Arrived... Better to think, "Oh, what an interesting --Beautiful!-- new way to see the world-- it's different from the last several ways I have seen it. I think I will explore it now."