f 'julie GEMINI VAX/VMS, Thursday, 26-Feb-1998 17:14 JMV4901 (Juliette M Vincent) is not logged in. Last logged in: Thursday, 26-Feb-1998 16:11 Mail: 1 new message. Plan: Hi there. I am Julie. Let's see...I am a music performance major on flute and voice. I love to write fiction and songs and on occasion I compose. Oh, and I am a Phantom of the Opera phanatic. So if you like to sing....drop a line or call on campus at 5153.(for those of you who happened to notice, my number just changed. I moved to a private room!!!!!!!!!!!) I can almost guarantee that I will be in the music building. that is where I actually live...not the dorms. Star Wars is another of my loves...and Star Trek. I role-play just about anything...and I love to read. Espescially classics and sci-fi. Want to know more? (sounds corny doesn't it?) Write me. (or if you know a real good, dirty joke. I appreciate those.) "Angel! I hear you! Speak -- I listen... stay by my side, guide me..." "Angel of music Hide no longer! Come to me, strange angel..." "Who was that shape in the shadows? Whose is the face in the mask?" "Fear can turn to love -- you'll learn to see to find the man, behind this monster: this...repulsive carcass, who seems a beast, but secretly dreams of beauty, secretly... secretly... Oh, Christine..." "Serafimo, away with this pretense! You cannot speak, but kiss me in my CROAK!" "love me...that's all I ask of you..." "I gave you my music. Made your song take wing, and now, how you repay me...denied me and betrayed me..." "Masquerade...papaer faces on parade. Hide your face so the world will never find you." "Twisted every way, what answer can I give?" Phantom: Wandering child...so lost...so helpless...yearning for my guidence... Christine: Angel or father, friend or Phantom? WHo is it there staring? Phantom: Have you forgoton your Angel...? Christine: Angel, oh speak. What endless longings, echo in this whisper..." "Angel of Music, I denied you. Turning from true beauty! Angel of Music, my protector. Come to me strange Angel..." "I'm here, I'm here monsuier! The angel of death! Come on, come on, monsuier! Don't stop, don't stop!" "We've passed the point of no return..." "Pitiful creature of darkness, what kind of life have you known? God gave me courage to show you, you are not alone..." "Christine, I love you..." "Fate links thee to me forever and a day..." "Holy Angel in Heaven blessed, my spirit longs with thee to rest!" "Erik! I have turned the scorpion!" "Don't cry for my loss Erik...I have never been worthy of your tears." "Take me...teach me..." "It was finished then, of course...that kiss ended evrything." "I am your Angel of Music, come to me Angel of Music..." There is no Angel of Music. And yet he continues to live in my mind...in my heart...and in my soul..." "And why...so great a no?"--Cyrano deBergerac "I knew I'd never know, that warm and loving glow. Though I might wish with all my might..."--The Hunchback of Notre Dame "Kyrie Eleison... Christe Eleison... Kryrie Eleison..." "What would I give to live where you are...? What would I pay to stay here beside you...? What would I do to see you, smiling at me...?"---THe Little Mermaid "Don't your feet get cold in the wintertime? The sky won't snow, and the sun won't shine And it's hard to tell the nighttime from the day... You're losing all your highs and lows, Ain't it funny how the feeling goes away... Desperado..."---The Eagles, "Desperado" "My only lovesprung from my only hate! Too early seen unknown, and known too late! Prodigious birth of love it is to me That I must love a loathed enemy."--Romeo and Juliet "O happy dagger! This is thy sheath. There rust, and let me die."--Romeo and Juliet "thus with a kiss, I die..."--Romeo and Juliet "Tonight, tonight, won't be just any night Tonight there will be no morning star. Tonight, tonight, I'll see my love tonight. And for us stars will stop where they are. Today the minutes seem like hours The hours go so slowly, and still the sky is light Oh moon grow bright, and make this endless day endless night... Tonight!"--West Side Story "I love him...but only on my own..."--Les Miserables "Don't you fret, Monsuier Marius, I don't feel any pain... A little fall of rain Can hardly hurt me now. (marius) I'm here... (eponine) That's all I need to know... And rain Will make the flowers..."--Les Miserables "I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past, I will turn the inner eye to see it's path. Where the fear has been, there will be nothing. Only I will remain."--Dune "I thought you must be dead..."--Arthur "So did I for a while, then I decided I was a lemon for a couple of weeks. I kept myself amused all that time jumping in and out of a gin and tonic."-Ford -----------------Life, the Universe, and Everything "Everyday, it's a getting closer, Going faster than a roller-coaster. Love like yours will surely come my way..."--Buddy Holly "Everyday" "'I happen to like nice men.'-Leia 'I am a nice man'-Han 'no you're not'-Leia 'Yes I am.'-Han"--Star Wars " Da, da, da..." "Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin"--Monty Python "Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated."--the Borg "We are all just prisoners here, of our own device."--Eagles "Hotel California" I've been the wild rover for many's a year And I've spent all me money on whiskey and beer. But now I'm returning with gold in great store, And I never will play the wild rover no more. (refrain) And it's no, nay, never. No, nay, never, no more That I play the wild rover. No never, no more. I went to an alehouse I used to frequent And I told the landlady me money was spent. I asked her for credit, she answered me, "Nay," "Such custom as yours I could have every day." refrain I brought up from me pocket ten sovereigns bright. And the landlady's eyes opened wide with delight. She said, "I have whiskeys and wines of the best." "Then I'll take ye upstairs and I'll show you the rest." refrain I'll go home to me parenrs, confess what I've done And ask them to pardon their prodigal son. And when they've caressed me as oft times before I never will play the wild rover no more. refrain(2) (that was a renn faire song. I have more to add later.) "Alas my love you do me wrong to cast me off discourteously. And I have loved you oh so long delighting in your company. Greensleeves was all my joy and greensleeves was my delight. Greensleeves my heart of gold, and all for my lady Greenslevees"-Greensleeves "Mother, Mother Ocean, I have heard you call. I've wanted to sail upon your waters since I was three feet tall. You've seen it all. You've seen it all. Watched the men who rode you Switch from sails to steam In your belly you hold such treasures That few have never seen. Most of them dreams, Most of them dreams. Yes I am a pirate, Two hunderd years too late The cannons don't thunder, there's nothing to plunder I'm an over forty victim of fate Arriving too late Arriving too late..."--Jimmy Buffet "A Pirate Looks at 40" "I'm just a cheeseburger in paradise Heaven on earth in an onion slice..."--Jimmy Buffet "Cheeseburger in Paradise" (If you are reading this plan file please write and tell me your opinion of it and make any comments that you wish.) Here is the dirty Renn Faire song..I'm going to add one stanza at a time, once a day. He placed his hands upon me toes Yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me toes Yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me toes, I said, "My dear, you're much too low." Go in, go out, go all about Yo-ho, yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me shins Yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me shins Yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me shins I said, "My dear, you're wits too thin." Go in, go out, go all about Yo-ho, yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me knees Yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me knees Yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me knees I said, "My dear, stop teasin' me." Go in, go out, go all about Yo-ho, yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me thighs Yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me thighs Yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me thighs I said, "My dear, don't make me cry." Go in, go out, go all about Yo-ho, yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me hair Yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me hair Yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me hair I said, "My dear, you're almost there." Go in, go out, go all about Yo-ho, yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me breasts Yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me breasts Yo-ho, yo-ho He placed his hands upon me breasts I said, "My dear, you've missed the best." Go in, go out, go all about Yo-ho, yo-ho, yo-ho That's it. The dirty Renn Faire song is finished. If you don't like it, then don't finger me anymore. If you do like it, drop a line and let me know how much. If you don't dig the blues, you got a hole in your soul. "I really do appreciate the fact you're sitting here. Your voice sounds so wonderful but your face don't look too clear. So barmaid bring a pitcher, another round of brew. Honey, why don't we get drunk and screw? (refrain) Why don't we get drunk and screw? I just bought a waterbed. It's filled up for me and you. They say you are the snub queen. Honey i don't think that's true. So why don't we get drunk and screw."--Jimmy Buffet (That is a great song) "We're on a misson from God."--Blues Brothers "Let's do the time warp again!!"--Rocky Horror Picture Show "So...come up to the lab...and see whats on the slab....I see you shiver with antici-...(say it, say it, say it)...-pation. But maybe the rain...isn't really to blame...so I'll remove the cause...but not...the symptom!"--Rocky Horror Picture Show "Then come no futher, for death awaits you with nasty, big, pointy teeth."--Monty Python and the Search for the Holy Grail "I had a dream my life would be, so different from this hell I'm living. So different now from what it seems...now life has killed the dream I dreamed..."--Les Miserables "Before I kill you, I think there is something that you should know. I am you father's, brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate."--Dark Helmet "And what does that make us?"--Lone Star "Absolutely nothing, which is what you are about to beome."--Dark Helmet "You see Lone Star, evil will always triumph because good is dumb."--Dark Helmet "I don't deserve a kiss...it's not my birthday...and I haven't been good..."--Phantom by Susan Kay "The unspoken plea echoed in my mind...forget me..."--Phantom by Susan Kay "Star Trekkin' across the universe On the starship Enterprise under Captain Kirk. Star Trekkin' across the universe Boldly going forward 'cause we can't find reverse." "Hell is full of burning boats, Nadir. I daresay that's what makes it so bloody hot."--Phantom "You must tie her down to the bed and spank her. You must spank her well. And when you are done you are free to deal with her as you wish. And after you are done with her, you must spank me." "And me.....and me.....and me....." "Yes, you must give us all a good spanking." "A spanking! A spanking!" "And after the spanking, the oral sex."--Monty Python and the Search for the Holy Grail "I thought our love would be so beautiful Somehow we'd make the whole world bright. I never knew that fear and hate could be so strong, All they'd leave us were those whispers in the night, And still my heart is saying we were right."--from "If I Never Knew You" "It's not my fault!"--Star Wars "Every now and then We find a special friend Who never lets us down. Who understands it all, Reaches out each time we fall. You're the best friend that I've found. And I knoq you can't stay But part of you will never vever go away... Your heart will stay... And I'll make a wish for you And hope it will come true That life will just be kind To such a gentle mind. And if you lose your way Think back on yesterday Remember me this way... Remember me this way... I don't need eyes to see The love you bring to me No matter where I go. And I know that you'll be there Forevemore a part of me From anywhere I'll always care I'll make a wish for you And hope it will come true That life will just be kind To such a gentle mind. And if you lose your way Think back on yesterday Remember me this way Remember me this way.... And I'll be right behinnd your shoulder Watching you. I'll be standing by your side In all you do. And I will never leave As long as you believe... You just believe... I'll make a wish for you And hope it will come true That life will just be kind To such a gentle mind And if you lose your way Think back on yesterday. Remember me this way... Remember me this way..." --"Remember me this way" "Angel of music Why this torment? When wil you see reason? Angel of Music You decieved me I gave my mind blindly..." "Only he has the power to move me And together we'd make the whole world move in sympathy Hope and pray that I am in time. Can he see that I will never guess That next time I'm gonna answer yes. Does he know if he comes back today This time I'm gonna make him stay... He...only he.... only he has the power Every day, every hour, He moves me..."--"Only He Has the Power to Move Me" "Touch me, It's so easy to leave me All alone with the memories of my days in the sun. If you touch me You'll understand what happiness is Look, a new day has begun."--"Cats" "When I give my heart It will be completely Or I'll never give my heart..."--"When I Fall in Love" "In the velvet darkness Of the blackest night Burning bright There's a guiding star No matter what or who you are.."--Rocky Horror Picture Show" "A whole new world With new horizons to pursue. I'll chase them anywhere There's time to spare Let me share this whole new world With you..."-------"A Whole New World" "Floating, falling Sweet intoxication. Touch me, trust me, Savor each sensation..."-------"The Music of the Night" "Little Lotte thought of everything and nothing Her father promised her that he would send her the Angel of Music Her father promised her..."----------"Phantom" "Farewell my fallen idol And false friend One by one I've watched Illusions shattered."------"Phantom" TAK "No thoughts within her head But thoughts of joy. No dreams within her heart But dreams of love..."-------"Phantom" "You have come here In pursuit of your deepest urge In pursuit of that wish which till now Has been silent... Silent... I have brought you That our passions may fuse and merge. In your mind you've already succumed to me Dropped all defenses completely succumed to me. And now you are here with me No second thoughts. You've decided... Decided... Past the point of no return No backward glances. The games we've played till now Are at an end. Past all thoughts of "if" or "when", Abandon thought and let the Dream descend. What raging fire shall flood the soul? What rich desire unlocks its door? What sweet seduction lies before us? Past the point of no return The final threshold What warm, unspoken secrets Will we learn, Beyond the point of no return... You have brought me To that moment where words run dry To that moment where speech disappears Into silence... Silence... I have come here Hardly knowing the reason why In my mind I've already imagined Our bodies entwining Defenseless and silent And now I am here with you No second thoughts I've decided... Decided... Past the point of no return No going back now Our passion-play has now At last begun. Past the point of right or wrong One final question How long should we two wait Before we're one? When will the blood begin to race? The sleeping bud burst into bloom? When will the flames, at last, Consume us? Past the point of no return The final threshold The bridge is crossed so Stand and watch it burn We've passed the point of no return..." ------------"Point of No Return" MARIUS A heart full of love A heart full of song I'm doing everything all wrong Oh God, for shame I do not even know your name Dear Mad'moiselle Won't you say? Will you tell? COSETTE A heart full of love No fear, no regret. MARIUS My name is Marius Pontmercy COSETTE And mines Cosette MARIUS Cosette, I don't know what to say COSETTE Then make no sound MARIUS I am lost COSETTE I am found! MARIUS A heart fulll of light BOTH A night bright as day MARIUS And you must never go away Cosette, Cosette! COSETTE This is a chain we'll never break MARIUS Do I dream? COSTTE I'm awake! MARIUS A heart full of love EPONINE He was never mine to lose COSETTE A heart full of you EPONINE Why regret what could not be? MARIUS A single look and then I knew EPONINE These are words he'll never say COSETTE I knew it too EPONINE Not to me... MARIUS From today EPONINE Not to me, not for me.. COSETTE Everyday COSETTE & MARIUS And it isn't a dream Not a dream After all. EPONINE His heart is full of love He will never Feel this way. -----------------"A Heart Full of Love" "And now I'm all alone again Nowhere to turn, no one to go to. Without a home, without a friend Without a face to say hello to. And now the night is near Now I can make believe he's here. On my own Pretending he's beside me. All alone, I walk with him till morning. Without him I feel his arms around me, And when I lose my way I close my eyes And he has found me. In the rain The pavement shines like silver All the lights are misty in the river. In the darkness The trees are full of starlight And all I see is him and me Forever and forever. And I know it's only in my mind. That I'm talking to myself and not to him. And although I know that he is blind Still I say there's a way for us. I love him But when the night is over He is gone, and the river's just a river. Without him The world around me changes The trees are bare and everywhere The streets are full of strangers. I love him But everyday I'm learning. All my life, I've only been pretending. Without me His world will go on turning A world that's full of happiness that I have Never known! I love him... I love him... I love him, But only on my own..." ---------------------"On My Own" "I'm here The Phantom of the Opera..." "There is a castle On a cloud. I like to go there In my sleep. Aren't any floors for Me to sweep, Not in my castle On a cloud. There is a room That's full of toys. There are a hundred Boys and girls. Nobody shouts or Talks too loud, Not in my castle On a cloud. There is a lady All in white, Holds me and sings A lullabye. She's nice to see and She's soft to touch. She says, "Cosette, I love you very much." I know a place where No one's lost. I know a place where No one cries. Crying at all is Not allowed. Not in my castle on a cloud." ---------------"Castle on a Cloud" "Master of the house Isn't worth me spit. Comforter, philosopher, And life-long shit. Cunning little brain, Regular Votaire. Thinks he's quite a lover, but There's not much there. What a cruel trick of nature Landed me with such a louse. God knows how I've lasted Living with this bastard in the house." ------------------"Master of the House" CHRISTINE In sleep he sang to me In dreams he came. That voice which calls to me And speaks my name. And do I dream again For now I find. The Phantom of the Opera is there, Inside my mind. PHANTOM Sing once again with me, Our strange duet. My power over you Grows stringer yet. And though you turn from me To glance behind The Phantom of the Opera is there Inside your mind. CHRISTINE Those who have seen your face Draw back in fear. I am the mask you wear PHANTOM It's me they hear CHRISTINE/PHANTOM Your/My spirit and my/your voice In one combined The Phantom of the Opera is there Inside my/your mind. VOICES He's here The Phantom of the Opera Beware The Phatom of the Opera PHANTOM In all your fantasies You always knew That man and mystery CHRISTINE Were both in you PHANTOM/CHRISTINE And in this labyrinth Where night is blind The Phantom of the Opera is there/here Inside your/my mind. PHANTOM Sing my Angel of Music CHRISTINE Ah! PHANTOM Sing! CHRISTINE Ah! Ah! PHANTOM Sing for me... CHRISTINE Ah! PHANTOM Sing my Angel of Music... CHRISTINE Ah! Ah! PHANTOM SING FOR ME!!!! CHRISTINE AHHHH!!!!!!! "I have brought you To the seat of sweet music's throne. To this kingdom where All must pay homage To music... Music... You have come here For one purpose and one alone. Since the moment I First heard you sing I have need you with me to Serve me, to sing For my music... My music..." "The line must be drawn here. This far, no futher. And I will make them pay for what they've done!" -----------First Contact "Twisted every way What answer can I give? Am I to risk my life To win the chance to live? Can i betray that man Who once inspired my voice? Do I become his prey? Do I have any choice? He kills without a thought. He murders all that's good. I know I can't refuse And yet i wish I could Oh God if I agree, What horrors wait for me In this the Phantom's opera?" ----------"Twisted Every Way" "Heart, don't fail me now. Courage, don't desert me. Don't turn back now that we're here. People always say Life is full of choices No one ever mentions fear. Or how the world can seem so vast, On a journey...to the past. Somewhere down this road I know someone's waiting Years of dreams just can't be wrong. Arms will open wide I'll be safe and wanted Back home where I belong. Well, starting now I'm learning fast, On this journey...to the past. Home, love, family... Once I must have had them too. Home, love, family... I will never be complete until I find you... One step at a time One hope then another Who knows where this road may go? Back to who I was. On to find my future Things my heart still needs to know. Yes let this be a sign. Let this road be mine. Let it lead me to my past. And bring me home...at last." "Dancing bears Painted wings, Things I almost remember. And a song Someone sings Once upon a December. Someone holds me safe and warm. Horses prance through a silver storm. Figures dancing gracefully, Across my memory. Someone holds me safe and warm. Horses prance through a silver storm. Figures dancing gracefully, Across my memory. Far away, Long ago Glowing dim as an ember Things my heart used to know Things it yearns to remember. And a song Someone sings Once upon a December." "Think of me Think of me fondly, When we've said goodbye. Remember me, Once in awhile. Please promise me you'll try. When you find That once again you long To take your heart back and be free, If you ever find a moment Spare a thought for me. We never said Our love was evergreen Or as unchanging as the seas, But if you can still remember Stop and think of me. Think of all the things we've shared and seen. Don't think about the things which might have been. Think of me Think of me waking, Silent and resigned. Imagine me Trying to hard to Put you from my mind. Recall those days, Look back on aall those times, Think of the things we never knew. There will never be a day when I won't think of you. We never said Our love was evergreen Or as unchanging as the seas But please promise me that sometimes You will think Of Me!!!!!" ------------"Think of Me" "We were strangers Starting out on a journey. Never dreaming What we'd have to go through. Now here we are And I'm suddenly standing At the beginning with you. No one told me I was going to find you. Unexpected What you did to my heart. When I lost hope You were there to remind me This is the start... (chorus) Life is a road And I wanna keep going. Love is a river I wanna keep flowing. Life is a road Now and forever Wonderful journey. I'll be there when the world stops turning I'll be there when the storm is through. In the end I wanna be standing At the beginning with you. We were strangers On a crazy adventure. Never dreaming How our dreams would come true. Now here we stand Unafrais of the future, At the beginning with you. chorus I knew there was somebody somewhere, Like me alone in the dark. Now my dream will live on I've been waiting so long Nothing's gonna tear us apart. chorus Life is a road And I wanna keep going. Love is a river I wanna keep going on... Starting out on a journey... Life is a road And I wanna keep going. Love is a river I wanna keep going. In the end I wanna be standing At the begining with you..." "None of us can choose where we will love...." "My mind has touched the farthest horizons of mortal imagination and reaches ever outward to embrace infinity. There is no knowledge beyond my comprehension, no art or skill upon this entire planet that lies beyond the mastery of my hand...But as long as I live, no woman will ever look upon me in love." "By the way Did I hear you say If some night I seemed too lonely You would stay. Oh and by the way Have I told you yet that only recently He moved out on me. Took the towels we stole From some motel in Tennessee. He was gone Long before he really left, I knew it. By the way He began to say, "Love takes time I'm in a hurry." Anyway That's all yesterday Let's get back to us. Why worry If he tries Calling by and by? Oh and by the way I thought I mentioned you could stay. 'neath the lights You don't look a thing like he did, And it's time to play It's another day We can't we make love Fall by the way..." "This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad. This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice, let us rejoice, And be glad." "I have loved but one man in my life. And I have lost him twice." ---------Cyrano de Bergerac Music is a state of mind. Of course, so is insanity. "Amazing grace how sweet the sound. That saved a wretch like me. I once was lost But now I'm found. Was blind but now I see." "Engage." "I like mine with lettuce and tomato Heinz 57 and french fried potatoes. A big koshier pickle and a cold draft beer, Well good God Almighty, which way do I steer from a Cheesburger in paradise." "My church has but one temple, Wide as the world is wide, Set with a million stars, Where a million hearts abide. My church has no creed to bar A single brother man But says, "Come thou and worship" To every one who can. My church has no roof or walls, No floor save the beautiful sod-- For fear, I would seem to limit The love of the illimitable God." --------------"My Church" by E.O.G. "We are the music-makers, And we are the dreames of dreams." The Highwayman Part one The wind was a torrent of darkness among the gusty trees, The moon was a ghostly galleon tossed upon cloudy seas, The road was a ribbon of moonlight over the purple moor, And the highwayman came riding-- Riding--riding-- The highwayman came riding, up to the old inn-door. (This is going to be an ongoing addition. It is one of my favorite poems by Alfred Noyes) Seek and ye shall find. I am not crazy because I am a music major. I am crazy because I love being a music major. PHANTOM Insolent boy, This slave of fashion, Basking in your glory. Ignorant fool This brave young suitor, Sharing in my triumph. CHRISTINE Angel I hear you Speak, I listen. Stay by my side Guide me. Angel my soul was weak Forgive me. Enter at last Master. PHANTOM Flattering child you shall know me. See why in shadow I hide. Look at your face in the mirror, i am there inside. CHRISTINE Angel of music Guide and guardian. Stay by my side Guide me. Angel of Music Hide no longer Come to me Strange angel. "Look at me a woman. Calm and in control. No silly girl whose head's always turning. Nobody would guess that deep inside my soul, a brand new flame is burning. Only he has the power to move me And together we'd make the whole world move in sympathy. he with him I would survive. Only he has the power to move me Take me, hold me, mold me, change me, and improve me. It's not funny any more. Only he can make my burden light Only he can make the wrong seem right. Only he can make the shadows bright And make the darkness gleam in white. He, only he. Only he has the power to move me. All the nights I've wasted Dreaming of the time When I'd discover the one to guide me. Searching the horizon Didn't realize that all the time he was beside me. Only he has the power to move me. And together we'd make the whole world move in sympathy It's mot funny any more. Can he see that I will never guess That next time i'm gonna answer yes Does he know if he comes back today This time I'm gonna make him stay. Only he has the power to move me Hope and pray that I am in time. Only he can make my burden light Only he can make the wrong seem right Only he has the power every day, every hour he moves me." the following is a joke that may be offensive to some people. It was told to me by a friend back home in Murfreesboro to make me laugh while I was hospitalized. If you are offended by Catholic jokes (like my wonderful boyfriend Jeremy) or use of the word "fuck" please skip past this little joke. Thank you. I am not responsible for any hurt feelings. There was once a great flood and all the people crowded onto a boat but the boat started to sink. There was also a Methodist minister, a Baptist preacher and a Catholic priest. They had a small boat that would save them. The Methodist minister said, "hurry into the boat." The Baptist preacher said, "What about the children?" The minister said, "Fuck the children." The priest said, "Hmmm....do we have the time?" I thought it was funny. But then, I am a music major. I find green jello funny. "Why did you threaten to strike a spirit? You still don't understand, do you? You acknowledged her, Broud, she has beaten you. You did everything you could to her, you even cursed her. She's dead, and still she has won. She was a woman, and she had more courage than you, Broud, more determination, more self-control. She was more man than you are. Ayla should have been the son of my mate." ---------Clan of the Cave Bear Geocities doesn't like me anymore. I have a new web page through Angelfire. One of my stories is slowly being put on it. It's at http://www.angelfire.com/tn/erikslair check it out if you have time. Okay everyone, most of you know but for those that don't I have been SICK. And I mean, on my deathbed sick. I was hospitalized and that really sucked. But I am better, just really weak so don't be too rough if you happen to see me. Well, I just wanted to inform everyone of that. Toga! Toga! Toga! I just thought of something. I discovered that I find men in kilts quite attractive. I don't know why. Maybe it's that quarter Scottish in me. But the guy that I even think about marrying has to look good in one. It's a thing. :) Okay, I just got through with my AT final. I am soooooo happy that it's over. My brain is fried. Time for sleep. "Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime. Lead me, save me from my solitude. Say you want me with you here, beside you. Anywhere you go let me go to. Christine, that's all I ask of you!" "Through early morning fog I see Visions of the things to be. Pains that are withheld for me I realize and I can see that Suicide is painless It brings on many changes. And I can take it or leave it if I please. The game of life is hard to play. I hold the wrong card everyday. I'm gonna lose it anyway So this is all I have to say, that Suicide is painless It brings on many changes. I can take it or leave it if I please. The sword of time will pierce our skin It doesn't hurt when it begins. But as it works its way on in The pain grows stronger, watch it burn. And Suicide is painless It brings on many changes And I can take it or leave it if I please. An old man once came up to me. And wanted answers to is it to be or not to be And I replied, "Oh why ask me?" Cause, Suicide is painless It brings on many changes. And I can take it or leave it if I please." Well, it is the start of a new semester and I am dealing with it so far. Um....not much to say about it right now. I am now a vocal education major without the education classes. I am going to change to vocal performane when the degree is offered. I just thought that I would take time to relax and throw in how I felt. Does anyone but me like the music from the movie Terminator? I have the soundtrack and one of my favorite pieces is the window conversation/love scene. It is absolutely beautiful. Welcome to my mind! How are you? I am 100% insane! Okay, time to babble about a few things on my mind. First, I may move to Berkley this summer. I don't know. But I am going to drive to California with two friends this summer. Next, I am a little sad. Mostly because i look for love and never seem to find it. But that's okay. One day I will. One day. Third, I want to warn anyone who might even want to talk to me that i am a weapons fanatic. I am also a good shot. So if you hate weapons of any type, you might want to avoid me. Well. That is all for now. More rambling later. It's me again. I simply haven't had time to write. But I wanted to say that I will try to add more as i find time. Okay, I have idea. Thatnks to Dennis for bringing this thought into my mind. Renn Faire is comeing up and he mentioned the fact that he wished there was one here. Well why not? He and I thought out a little of it. If you think that it may be a good idea, please write and let me know. I love opinions. :) I have news for everyone who actually has the patience to get this far. I will, most likey, not be here next semester. My family will be moving to Southern California in the summer and I will probably go with them. So my new goal is to make this plan file a monster before I am gone. So bear with me while I find meaningless things to fill as much space as i can. I think I think too much. But when I stop and think about it, if I really thought as much as I think I do, I think I would be so full of thoughts as to not think clearly, and clearly I think thoughts of clear thinking. And even if I do think I think contant thoughts of thinking to be true, wouldn't that be another thought to add to the endless thoughts I think; that is, if my thinking was truly thoughtless. I think. But what if I had thought I think too much about thinking thoughts of endless things, what thinkable harm can that be? I think I'm really going to have to stop and think this through more throughly. What do you think? "Men do not roar. Women roar. Then they hurl heavy objects and claw at you." "Things are only impossible until they are not" "If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought to go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wonderous, with treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid." "And I told him what I thought of him, his pals, his planet, and I possibly made some passing reference to his questionable parentage." "He's biting that female!" "It's a good day to die and the day is not over yet." "Not even a bite on the cheek for old time's sake?" "Sir, I protest. I am not a merry man!" "Motives, who cares for motives?" "THERE ... ARE ... FOUR ... LIGHTS!!!" BTW, for anyone who really cares, all those last quotes are from various episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation. Now it's time for some more babble, mostly because I just got really bored. I was wondering if anyone else has a love for music, man-made or by nature. I would love to share ideas with someone on the meaning of song. More junk from my head. I am now a general curriculum major. Since I am moving to California, I decided to relax my schedule and save myself from getting too stressed out. And for anyone who knows me, I am a hopeless romantic and I thought that I would share some thoughts with you. I have decided that when i do find love, it will be with one who feels as I do about the music. In essence, a Phantom to Christine. I don't know if I will ever find that one, but I hope so. It's so hard to find anyone who cares the way I do about song. But hopefully I will find that someone soon. "Father once spoke of an angel. I used to dream he'd appear. Now as I sing, I can sense him. And I know he's here." And I wait for the silence that I know must fall. Broken only be the sad sound of a lonely lover's call. FANTINE Come with me where chains will never bind you. All your grief at last, at last behind you. Lord in heaven look down on him in mercy VALJEAN Forgive me all my trespasses and take me to your glory. FANTINE/EPONINE Take my hand I'll lead you to salvation. Take my love for love is everlasting. FANTINE/EPONINE/VALJEAN And remember the truth that once was spoken, To love another person is to see the face of God. "It's a rainy night in Georgia. Such a rainy night in Georgia. It feels like it's raining all over the world. It feels like it's raining all over the world." "I thought we are were the children of God. God help the outcasts. The children of God." I just realized something. I never once really said what I like and dislike. Well, here it goes: I am a Virgo, but I am one of the messiest(sp) people you will will ever find. I am only organized when it isn't my stuff or my life. I like romantic evenings, looking at the stars, singing in duets, sitting in silence, walking on the beach at night,and dancing in the rain. But I am also very independant in my nature. I can be very cold and quiet, and even arrogant-seeming. But if you get to know me i do have a soft side. The independant thing is to keep me from being hurt. I know that one day I will open up to someone and I won't be near as cold. I hate people who try to repress my independant side without accepting it as a part of me. I also don't like country music, clingy people, English, people who propose marriage in the second week of dating (don't laugh, it has happened to me), and people who lie. I can tolerate but would prefer not to, people who sit on the computer chatting when someone else needs to check mail, and quite a few other things. But unfortunately most people don't realize that I am a romantic because I only show it when I feel it is right, and that isn't often. "have you forgotten your angel?" RAOUL No more talk of darkness. Forget these wide-eyed fears, I'm here Nothing can harm you. My words will warm and calm you. Let me be your freedom. Let daylight dry your tears. I'm here With you, beside you. To guard you and to guide you. CHRISTINE Then say you'll love me every waking moment. Turn my head with talk of summertime. Say you need me with you now and always. Promise me that all you say is true. That's all I ask of you. RAOUL Let me be your shelter Let me be your light, You're safe. No one will find you. Your fears are far behind you. CHRISTINE All I want is freedom. A world with no more night. And you, always beside me. To hold me and to hide me. RAOUL Then say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime. Let me lead you from your solitude. Say you want me with you here beside you. Anywhere you go let me go to. Christine, that's all I ask of you. CHRISTINE Say you'll love me every waking moment. Say the word and I will follow you. Say you want me with you here, beside you. Say you love me... RAOUL You know I do... BOTH Love me, that's all I ask of you. (musical interlude) BOTH Anywhere you go let me go to. Love me, that's all I ask of you. ---------------"All I Ask of You" Here is a rough draft of a story that I wrote over the summer. It is Phantom based and takes place after the end of the musical. She cried silent tears. Tears of sorrow and loss. Tears of love torn apart. Raoul put his arm around her in the carriage. "Shhh...it will be alright, Christine." HIs soft words did nothing to calm her. The the sobs ripped from her throat in an anguished scream and salty tears flowed down her cheeks. Christine thought nothing of the man who tried to comfort her; her mind was still aching from the emotional rip from the man she loved. Not even an hour agao she had been pulled away from Erik, sent away by his concern and his love for her. And because of that love she had obeyed. "Erik...," she whispered. That word cut through Raoul's heart. She loves him, he thought. More than she will ever love me. He knew that he should let her go, let her return. But his arm tightend around her shoulders. No, I fought that monster for her and I will not let her return to him. Christine lapsed into a fitful sleep a few moments later. ******************************************* It was their third month in the small house. Raoul felt comfortable but he was worried about Christine. She was quiet and always letting her mind drift. She would stare out a window or write in a small journal. Her beautiful lips no longer parted in laughter or turned up into a smile. On this particualr night there was a storm raging outside. Christine jumped at the sound of a loud thunderclap. She put down her pen and walked to her front door. Her small, frail hand paused above the handle as her eyes flicked around the room. It was empty. Raoul was in the kitchen fixing dinner. Without another hesitation, Christine stepped outside of her protective home and into the fury of the storm. The wind swirled her hair about her face but she did not notice. The her ears twitched slightly. Music...music that she had not heard for months... "Fate links thee to me, forever and a day..." The wedding march from Romeo and Juliet. Erik used to sing that to her. Christine walked toward a small cliff that overlooked a valley. The wind increased its intensity and the music increased it's volume. At the edge, her feet stopped. The wind died slightly and so did the voice. Her eyes closed, her mouth opened and she whispered, "Erik, I am here..." And the wind answered. "I am your Angel of Music... Come to me Angel of Music..." Raoul walked into the front room carrying Christine's dinner when he noticed that she was no longer there. He looked around in confusion. "Christine?" A spatter of rain hit his face and he looked for the source. "The door...." He bolted out of the house screaming, "Christine!" There she stood, soaked to the skin, only inches from the precipice. And she was smiling. Raoul walked toward her slowly, afraid of startling her. "Christine, come back from the edge..., "his voice trailed off as she turned her face toward him. A pale, white hand reached for his. "He has come for me, Raoul. And I am leaving with him. Raoul looked at her, puzzled. "Him?" Then he heard the music, music he thought he'd left behind. His music. "No! I won't let youleave. You must be imagining things. Erik is dead." Her hand released his and feel to rest at her side. "You cannot stop me, Raoul. Erik is truly an angel and soon I shall fly with him." Lightning flashed and the thunderclap caused Raoul's ears to ring. When his senses were back to normal, he heard the voice." "I am your Angel of Music... Come to me Angel of Music..." Caought up in memories of the past, he shook a fist at the sky. "Erik! You cannot have her. You sent her away, monster, I will not let her go!" Yet the voice continued to sing. Christine looked at Raoul with the saddest expression that he had ever seen in her eyes. "Goodbye, Raoul. Please do not forget me." She sang softly, "Think of me...think of me fondly...." Christine turned back toward the cliff and lifted her face to the sky. Rushing wind howled and the music bacame louder. Christine's voice cut through the storm and joined with another, powerful voice. "Past the point of no return, the final threshold...." Raoul reached for her, but even as his hand brushed the fabric of her dress, shep lept into the air, still singing. "The bridge is crossed so stand and watch it burn..." Raoul cried out, "Christine!" But it was too late. He fell to the ground and looked over the edge. Christine's white form lay on the rocks a hundred feet below. Music echoed impossibly through the dying wind. "We've passed the point of no return." ******************************************* Raoul rushed down the hill, falling and stumbling, trying to reach the bottom. Christine's broken body lay limp at the foot of the cliff. He dashed to her and fell to his knees, barely registering the pain. "Oh Christine," he cried, cradling her head. "Christine..." "Christine," an echo replied. He looked up and adressed the calm, gray sky. "Erik, you finally got what you fought so hard for. You took her away from me even after your death. She loved you more than she loved life. Take care of her, Erik." A small beam of sunlight burst from the overcast sky and shone down upon Christine's lovely form, and for a moment he heard two voices. The voices of angels. "Love me, that's all I ask of you..." ******************************************* That's it. Just remember that it is only my first draft. Hope you enjoyed it. ******************************************************************************** ******************************************************************************** Now this is a story that was based on a single RPG session. It was so memorable that I wrote it down and expanded it. A Jedi's Tale: Ayla's Story Historian's note: This begins shortly after the destruction of the first Death Star. Part 1 "What do you mean, 'No more room'?" "Just that, miss. We are booked full." Panic flows through me and not even a Jedi calming technique quells it. A blaster bolt ricochets above the pilot's head. The Bith emits a squak of alrm and dives to the floor. I bolt out of the docking bay, pausing only to make sure that the Bith is uninjured. My ratty cloak and brown hair billow behind me as I dash down the streets. Suddenly a man holding a blaster appears in front of me and takes aim. Gathering the Force, I leap over him and a crowd of people. For just a moment I have the sensation of flying. Then, with a jolt, I hit the ground. A voice follows me. "You can't run forever, Ayla!" A flash of the future and I know he is right. Even so I keep on running. The bag that I carry over my shoulder is getting heavy. I turn into an alley and lean against a wall, breathing heavily. Sliding to the dirt I set the bag down and check to make sure that the gold ribbon is still tied around my wrist. As I touch it, memories come unbidden to me. Memories of the past. I see my parents, happy and smiling at me for I was a good child. Then their expressions turn to sadness as my pet slowly dies. Not knowing any better I use the strange power that I only heard about in bad stories to heal it. Yhen I am exiled. Alone at the age of ten. Five years fly by in a blur until I end up on a dusty planet, poor and lonely. Suddenly, like an angel, Kris appears and takes me in. He is a seventeen year-old Jedi master and he begins to teach me. Years go by and I am eighteen, a Jedi knight, staring into the eyes of my dying teacher and friend. Then I am in our house, crying as I pack a few of his belongings, including a lightsaber, and I take the gold ribbon that he usually bound his hair back with and tie it around my wrist. More time passes and I catch glimpses of my flight from Imperials and various bounty hunters. Finally I reach the present and i wipe the tears from my eyes. I open my mind completely and I feel the bounty hunter's, Storm, mins closing in on my location. Quickly I get to my feet and resume my flight. Up ahead I spot a cantina of sorts. Increasing my speed, I burst into the building and stop short. There is no back door. My mind searches for someone that I might know. Two people at the bar catch my attention. A Jedi, young and inexperienced, and a young, attractive human man beside him. Before I can ask for assitance Storm walks in and locates me immediately. As he moves toward me, the man next to the Jedi kicks out his leg. His foot connects with Storm's knee and for a momment he totters. The man, on the other hand, winces in pain and grips his knee. Strom turns his glare on the now injured man. "Saragin Lucian. I've heard about you." "Oh really? I hope it's good." ****************************************************************************** This story is going to take awhile to type and my fingers are tired. Okay...so life isn't as bad as everyone says it is.Maybe if I just give it a chance in a dark room, life perks up. Well, I am a person who tries to stay happy, but it seems like so many things go wrong that I can't seem to find something that works right. And that sux. But like I said, maybe if I let go and accept things as they are, then they might actually turn out better than I expected. Not always, but sometimes. And it is those few times that I keep on striving for. Oh, and everybody, I get my braces off on Friday!!! Four hours of laughing gas!!! But I am excited about it. They have been on for about 3 1/2 years. Far too long... :) Hello once again. It is the start of a new week and, perhaps a new me. I think that this will be a good week. Even with the rain. So let's keep on going and pray that I can keep finding stuff to put in here. :) Okay....what to babble about for a few minutes.....so far my week hasn't been bad. Just a little sad. I feel like Data in "First Contact". Try to cope with emotions and I just fel like saying, "I no longer want these emotions!" But unlike him, I can't just turn them off. I wish that I could but, then again, I want to enjoy them for as long as possible. I just don't know what to do about them. It is a most interesting sensation. Right now, I don't think that I will tell what it is. Maybe once I get sort of comfortable with it I will tell the world, but for now I keep it to myself. Hopefully though, I will finally be able to put this emotion to use in a good way. "All your music, beautiful music... you are my life and you are music..." My true love, lost in a shadowplay I will find a way. Through fear and doubt I will find you out. In the secret places you hide about. No my love more than a fantasy, you must be for me. I'll hear your voice and I'll see your brow and I'll know your face like your music. Can you hear me now? Can we make a vow? Ever to be faithful I will show you how. My true love open and turn to me what no one can see. Your deepest dreams in you darkest nights. and your eyes like lights ever burning bright. I will hear your voice I'll see you brow. Let me know your face, let me know it now! I bought a book at Wal-Mart last semester and I thought thatI mention it quickly. It's called "If: questions for the game of life" And all of the questions in there start with "if". One of my favorites is, "If you had to have a musical instrument represent you, what would it be?" My friends and I have assumed that this means traditional instruments, saying a cd player doesn't count. But I have heard many different instruments and they are all appropriate in their own way. Mine would have to be a piano. I think that the piano can produce such a variety of emotions that it reminds me of how I am. So, if you had to have a musical instrument represent you, what would it be? Write me and tell me. i am curious as to what people think is their instrument. There will be more to come each day. So always keep checking. Any ideas or opinions are welcome. :) Angel of Music P.S. Sleep is actually a good thing....I just can't get enough of it...but I still need more...oh well.... P.P.S.S. It is amazing how thoughts change as your life changes. Small events can cause large problems or wonderous events. P.S.s. I happen to like South Park as well. I think that it is a great show especially if you need a good laugh. p.s. I went to Search this past weekend and so I am feeling really good now. If you happen to see me and wonder why I am acting so strange, it is because I am much less stressed out. :) pppppssssss HELLO WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!